So interesting

I know I already posted today, but I read this during lunch and find it fascinating!

I am still a year later trying to get through "Radical" by David Platt. I just always get interrupted and I am about half way through. I read today though, which is SO completely true, that as Christians, we are one of the only organizations on this planet that deems success by what we DON'T do. He is discussing it within the context of how we deem "good Christians". And that we rate ourselves by how we don't do certain things, like what is in the world. And I find this idea so compelling.

Shouldn't we be rating success on what we DO? I don't believe there is necessarily a right or wrong way to go about this idea. However, so arguments sake, I think that we, as Christians, should focus not on the
" I don't watch R rated movies" or "I don't have pre-marital sex" as or rating scale. But instead more so with "I let God have say in what movies I see or don't, determined by what the Spirit is leading" or "We go and have dinner once a month with a group of non-Christians and try and live out biblical lifestyles, to encourage discussion on what sets us apart". Trying to shift the focus from what we say is bad all the time, to focusing on what is good for us to do. I mean isn't it told to us to think and meditate on the good, righteous, holy.... I feel that by focusing on what we don't do, in fact makes us think about that thing we are avoiding. "I don't watch porn", well by saying that I feel that your mind and whoever your talking with then unintentionally imagines porn. While instead it should be a conversation on "I just watched Courageous" and open a door to discuss wholesome entertainment and why you choose to watch that, and see what questions come from your friend or colleague, etc.

Just a thought. Thanks Platt for planting that seed of thought.

Child Advocacy Center

Here I am second day of my new internship. I will work 424 hours here. I will graduate in 116 days. My roommate will be married a month after that. My dear friend from SVR will be married 10 days after my roommate. And I might be starting graduate school a month after that. Crazy how time moves so swiftly.

I am reminded here at the Child Advocacy Center of all the blessings God has poured into my life.

I was not raised in an abusing home.
I have not been assaulted in ways that these children have.
I have been told "I love you" for 21 years and counting.
I have a life that is full of promise.

Now I sit reading police reports and details of awful sin that many wish not to think about. However, I realize in hearing these stories, the great mercy that comes form my Father. He looks at me and says I was worth His son dying, and that if I am worth it, even these perpetrators are worth it. That's a hard thing to swallow, but it is truth. And today, I am reminded that grace is not for the clean, put together individuals. It is for the dirty. It is for the gross. Because in reality, we are all that, just some cover it up better than others.

Here is to another day filled with His unconditional mercy.

6 moths later...

I have no idea is anyone even reads this blog. But sometimes I find it extremely therapeutic, therefore I keep writing. Since this summer I have had an internship with homicide loss survivors. I continued my work with International Justice Mission and my job with the International and Intercultural Department. Now I have applied to 3 graduate schools and will find out starting in about a month on whether or not that is the path that my life is taking. I have my own apartment now off campus. I will graduate in 4 months! And I will either be working with children that have suffered sexual or physical abuse and be their court advocate, or doing a residential drug and alcohol addiction center for teen boys. Both sound amazing! So now its just to nail down which one I want to do. So that is my 6 month update.

Today I went to my high school and visited the Jamaica Team, the same team I helped lead a year ago. This trip was influential in changing my life. It will always have a place in my heart! It almost feels like another home. I would love to one day work there long term. I love the mountains of Jamaica and the deaf kids at CCCD.  My thoughts are now on kids that I met there struggling with such real life issues yet not being given a voice to change. I have a friend there that is gay and is struggling to know why God would make him this way to be put in a school of people who don't accept him. I have known him now for close to 4 years and he is such a sweet boy. We have had many conversations about his sexual orientation and my view of this predicament. I have another friend who is there and struggles with being a single girl and holding to her Christian standards in life when she feels so alone in the deaf village surrounded by married women and being one of the only single women there.

And both of these friends are people that I wish I could live in community with. There are days I just want to sell all that I own, drop out of college, and fly there and live in community. But I know that is now where God is leading me right now. I love to think that my future will hold that sometime. Now its just to hold them in prayer and the teams that go there still and minister to them. So those of you reading, please read aloud these names and just ask that God move through them and utilize them in encouraging these sisters and brothers in Christ that are dealing with a different kind of struggle and persecution. John, Alex, Jonathan, Luke, Andrew, Nick, Daniel, Sandy, Maria, Hannah, Kaitlyn, Morgan, Casey, Rebecca, Kim, Nancy, Linnay, and Mark.

Working to support the ministry. Working to be the ministry. Working to trust. Working to love. Working to selflessness.

My friend of four years, L.

Jamaican Sunrise